Psychology: Bad at small talk and boredom: These problems indicate high intelligence

This text first appeared here on brigitte.

Psychology: Bad at small talk and boredom: These problems indicate high intelligence

This text first appeared here on brigitte.de

Many people consider intelligence to be a rather desirable trait. The general opinion is that those who are clever get through life better and are more successful.

Only a few realize that people with above-average intelligence do not automatically have it easy. Do you know any of the following problems? Then you probably know from your own experience that a high IQ can actually be a challenge. These problems speak for a high intelligence:

Are you the quiet one in the group, even if the conversation is of great interest to you? Do you end up frustrated with group brainstorming because others are voicing your ideas while you're still reflecting on them? No wonder! With every thought, you always see a huge pile of context. You directly include different perspectives in each of your considerations.

And if things go really badly, you then ask yourself the question of relevance. By the time you've gone through all of this, the others have long since moved on to the next topic. Or they just stare at you with wide eyes when you say something, because of course they haven't given all your thoughts and have no idea what you're actually talking about.

Blablablabla - everyone is talking, laughing, telling jokes about their lives and you're always wondering where the bus is? With the people who care?! You just don't get along with shallow topics and you still try to embed them in a context in which they have meaning while the others are waiting for your reaction.

So you pretend, feign interest, improvise. Exhausting – and probably not just for you!

Your brain constantly needs new challenges and projects, otherwise you lose interest. Once you learn something (which usually happens pretty quickly), it loses its appeal pretty quickly.

You need variety, variety and more variety in your job - and such a job is not that easy to find, unfortunately...

Do you envy people who can make decisions spontaneously and from the gut? On the other hand, do you see an incredible number of options that you have to decide between? And then do you always play through all these variants in your head first, with their consequences and conditions, and then weigh up for a long time which way is the best?

Well, condolences! And a little food for thought: Perhaps the "meaning of life" is more about trying out as many things as possible and learning from them than doing everything "right" the first time. After all, no one knows what is "right" anyway!

Your position is crystal clear, but you still find it incredibly difficult to stand up for it and represent it - because you can just understand the other positions so well!

It's maddening: With every argument the other person makes, you understand exactly where it comes from and what he means by it. You see that it is justified and look for the point in the train of thought of your counterpart where you can come together. But by the time you've found him, the argument is usually over, the other person thinks he's right and you don't think it makes sense to bring the whole thing up again.

Who cares?! Firstly, you think about everything and everyone anyway, including yourself, of course. And secondly, you lack a lot of positive feedback: For example, for your great ideas, which you usually keep secret, or for the decisions that you put off until fate or others they have met. But you're just a human being like everyone else and you need social feedback to build your self-esteem.

Therefore: Find at least one or two people who have the same problems as you and talk to them or just spend time together. And don't make it so damn difficult for yourself! You are no more and no less valuable than anyone else. You have the right to make mistakes and to do or say something stupid or not well thought out. Even if it's difficult: Stop brooding and take a risk!

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