"Being trapped behind walls": When loneliness makes you sick

Some people are alone, but don't feel lonely.

"Being trapped behind walls": When loneliness makes you sick

Some people are alone, but don't feel lonely. Nevertheless, loneliness is widespread and the corona pandemic has once again raised awareness of the issue. What are the consequences of loneliness and what can be done about it?

Little response, no closeness, hardly any exchange: Many people in Germany feel lonely, and Corona has made the problem even worse. "It's difficult to give concrete numbers, some studies even before Corona assumed several million," says Maike Luhmann, loneliness researcher from the Ruhr University in Bochum. One thing is clear: “During the pandemic there was a significant increase in lonely people. This affects all age groups – and especially the younger ones.”

The possible consequences are serious: "If you're lonely for a long time, it can lead to significant physical and mental problems," explains the scientist. Depression, anxiety and addictions could occur more frequently. But cardiovascular disease and even dementia have also been linked to loneliness. But how can loneliness be alleviated? And what can society and maybe each individual do?

Great Britain is a positive example for many. There has been a government post there since 2018 that is responsible for combating loneliness. For example, doctors can issue prescriptions against loneliness, on which they prescribe social activities, for example. And in the Netherlands, a supermarket chain has introduced chat counters where you can exchange a few words while shopping.

But something is also happening in Germany - on different levels. In Baden-Württemberg, 20 "chatter benches" were set up during a day of action last year to get people talking to each other. The Hessian state government is currently looking for creative concepts against loneliness in a competition. "In Hesse there are diverse and inclusive campaigns, small and large projects that work across generations against loneliness and isolation - and we want to honor their commitment," says Social Minister Kai Klose (Greens).

And at the beginning of the year, the "Loneliness Competence Network" (KNE), supported by the federal government, was launched. "Loneliness has many faces and reasons and is not a question of age," said then Minister for Family Affairs Anne Spiegel (Greens). The KNE is about pooling knowledge, connecting committed people and developing a strategy against loneliness.

Of course people would feel lonely from time to time, but it is important that this does not become a permanent condition, says Alexander Langenkamp from the Frankfurt Institute for Social Work and Social Pedagogy and research associate at the KNE. "Chronic loneliness is what makes us sick." You also have to distinguish between loneliness and being alone: ​​"Loneliness is a negative feeling. Being alone is a physical condition. You can be surrounded by people and feel lonely, but you can also be alone and feel happy."

The presenter and author Bärbel Schäfer, who lives in Frankfurt, has recently dealt intensively with the topic of loneliness. Her recently published book "Ava's Secret" is about her encounter with an old acquaintance who is lonely and the two women's cautious approach. "Loneliness means feeling alone, not being connected. It's being trapped behind walls and ultimately it means not having a receiver for the needs for closeness and exchange," says Schäfer.

Both individuals and society should be more sensitive to the issue. She advises staying tuned in when you get the first signals from someone close - and getting them involved. "Sometimes it's enough just to be there." While working on the book, Schäfer also looked for clues in her own life. She experienced moments of loneliness, especially in her teens: "This searching self is something that I also know. This not arriving and feeling very lost in the world."

It is important to break taboos, says the author. Loneliness is still a shameful topic. "People often don't see this silent and invisible suffering. It's different than a broken leg." During the pandemic and lockdown, many people would have had an inkling of what it means to be lonely. "Corona woke us up and made us aware of the issue. That can also be an opportunity."

But how can things continue in a post-corona period? She expects that the number of lonely people in Germany will decrease again this year after the high in 2021, says expert Luhmann. "But what I fear is that the loneliness gap will widen further. In other words, that inequality will continue to increase." Many, especially the younger ones, will probably be able to overcome their loneliness - especially now that social life is starting again. "But there are the others who have slipped into chronic loneliness during the pandemic. They need our help to get out of it."

(This article was first published on Monday, April 25, 2022.)


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